Shed No Tears

"The pain of life is great/And some will find it sweet/To rot beneath the earth/As we rot and live an breathe" -- Will Shatter.

Awake at 4 a.m., I had trouble going back to sleep. I admit to not thinking about anything but how disappointed I am by life right now. I did a little crying, then fell back asleep. Why is doing what I want to do so hard? Am I afraid to fail? Of course. But that is only one small part of the story. If I could get my ego out of the way I could just forge ahead without reservation. So be it.

"Get Away"

I remember my band Noise For Nothing opening for Fugazi at Tacoma's Community World Theater in 1987 I believe. I wore Flipper pants -- pants I had drawn the Flipper fish all over, and I mean, all over. We did a cover of Flipper's song, "Get Away" and other songs to a crowd of fifteen. I don't remember a lot of that show but do remember singing that song. Oh, and rockin' out to Fugazi when they played. Danger Mouse also played, and tried to have pizza delivered onstage. I don't remember if they succeeded. It was not long after that I was kicked out of my own band because I couldn't really sing... it devastated me. Go, go get away

Life Is The Only Thing Worth Living For, Part Two

There is no doubt that Will Shatter, Gemini that he was, had at least two sides to him. One side was a drugged-up nihilist; the other, a hopeful anarchist. That hopeful side was illustrated in songs such as "Life", where Will sang about finding out "what living is all about". "It's life, life, life is the only thing worth living for."

This would be good for me to remember as I struggle through these days of depression and ennui, unemployed, unmotivated, just "un". Especially now that it may be a couple of weeks where I will be stuck without any money, unless I pawn something. So, along with my inspirational readings and cds, I can go back to Will Shatter's song "Life" for some additional comfort and strength.

I Should Be Working On The Book

Instead of doing this blog. It's the beginning of another month. My goal this month is to complete a chapter, maybe two, and contact some more people I need to interview. I am feeling rather down lately, not very inspired, but I think about working on it every damn day. We'll see how far I get.

Team Falconi

While some "Twilight" fans are either Team Jacob or Team Edward, I have put myself on Team Falconi. Ted Falconi's guitar-playing is absolutely one of my favorite things in the world. When I listen to the song "We Don't Understand"on the "Public Flipper, Ltd" album, I feel a sense of orgasmic bliss unlike any other, due mostly to the guitar feedback that introduces the song. So, though insane to some, I must admit publicly that I am on Team Falconi. Don't laugh. Just listen and learn to love him/it.

Still Plugging Along

The book is taking shape. Some far off "angels" are helping me (Thanks Jeri and James!). I'm working tomorrow but Saturday will be another writing day for me. June 10th is coming up, which was Will's birthday. Gonna do some writing, listen to some songs, and have a seance (just kidding). Bye for now!

Some Lyrics By Will Shatter

In Your Arms
Will Shatter

I want to be with you
I want to hear your breath
Keeping time with mine
I want to hold you
I want to smell your body
Blending into mine
When I reached out for you
You could not be found
When I needed you to comfort me
You said you were too busy
You were already holding
A needle in your arms
Oh the needle in your arms
It left you breathless
It’s fluids rushing to your heart

To use is no vice
Look at my life
I would never try to judge you
I hate to play the fool
But when one pleasure
Excludes, dilutes, and pollutes
All the others
I don’t find that any fun
No not any longer
When I reached out for you
You could not be found
When I needed you to comfort me
You said you were too busy
You were already holding
A needle in your arms
Oh the needle in your arms
It left you breathless
Its fluids rushing to your heart

Black beauties,white cross, white tops, dexadrine, methadrine,amphetamine,preludin, disoxin, chicken crank, benzadrine, bennies, speed, coke, snow, blow, cron, codeine, morphine,percodan,heroin, H, horse, dilaudid, dope,PCP, Angel Dust, STP, DMT, MDA, Anything! Everything you got

Yeah the needle in your arms
It left you breathless
Its fluids rushing to your heart

© 1982 Will Shatter Insect Music/BMI